Just a midwestern guy who understands that a hotdog is NOT a sandwich. It is simply a tube of meat wrapped in a bun. (ketchup is allowed)


I write Sci-fi screenplays while listening to 80’s inspired synthwave in my downtime.


I hold a Guinness World Record.

I met Jackie Chan once, he’s nice.

I fought a brown bear in Aspen…well it was a brown black bear…

If we go to a restaurant together I will tell the waitstaff it’s your birthday.